Fast Five

A movie in which everyone gets not just a car, but a Koenigsegg CCX
Just got back from Fast Five, the fifth film in the Fast and the Furious franchise, and the third outing in a row from director Justin Lin, writer Chris Morgan, and composer Brian Tyler. And while I remember being happily surprised by both Tokyo Drift and Fast and Furious, Fast Five is the film that will finally get me to remember these guys' names, and it has me hoping they get to do another one. I'm thinking Fast and the Furious: 6th Gear.

Also, looks like this is another major American studio release that South Korea got a week ahead of the States. So, yeah, spoilers. THEY'RE ALL BACK! Yes, ALL OF THEM. Even the dead ones! And the hot ones...and the funny ones...and the ones who think they are so hot and funny, but you know, they're not. Unfortunately, there are some actors/characters who just don't have the charisma that they seem to appear to think they do, but I will tell you one thing: Pick Up Line Tyrese is NOT one of those people.

Yes, he literally says that in the film, and yes, it is awesome, but not nearly as good as the several times he threatens those around him through the fine art of mumbling. The other big winner for charisma in this movie is, as always, Paul Walker as Brian O'Connor, a man who never met a large Hanes T-shirt he didn't like. It would be great to someday see another FF movie focusing on these two in the style of 2Fast 2Furious, but for now, it's awesome just to have Tyrese back in the mix.

As for everyone else? They are also in the movie, and while at times that is neat, and at least never terrible, they are all secondary to the cars and stunt work. There are two insanely awesome car action set-pieces, and then a couple of shorter sequences, some played more for laughs than suspense. But the train scene and the final chase are worth the price to see the movie on their own. And you know from the trailer that in the final action sequence, a couple of Dodge Chargers are pulling a huge safe through the streets of Rio de Janeiro, and that is somewhat cool, but also somewhat completely baffling that things don't just go to shit every time those Chargers make a turn.


So, while this movie does at times play fast and loose and furious with physics, it's still great fun, and by far the best fifth film in any franchise series ever.*†


*Especially if we count Batman (1966) as the first in the Batman series.


†But if we go in numbered episode order for Star Wars, we're in trouble.

Magnus, Robot Fighter

Magnus doesn't usually wear pants, but when he does, it's a hit.