Halloween 2k4

Speed Hump

Fake cat ears work for me.

Never fall asleep around drunk people.

Dickensian

The best Freaky Friday situation is the one that happened to Clark and Lionel. The second best is when it happened on 2 Stupid Dogs.Third is when it happened to Keanu Reeves. And dead last is when it happened to Lindsey Lohan. This is because like all rational citizens, I do not believe her film or music career should be encouraged in any way, lest she continue to think that her being famous is acceptable.

The worst part about art is looking at a piece of art that has decided to be about a fish hook through a penis.

My review of I Heart Huckabees.

Marky Mark was existentiallent. Roger told me that one, so I guess it's actually his review.

Drugs are bad, mmmkay?

Script by Evan McB, art by John Cassaday.

Hooty for Dummies.

Would you like to hear a story? Yes? About Marv? Yes? YES? Seems he was walking home one day, and he happened to come across some likely folks tossing a frisbee in front of a dormitory. The disc was overthrown and landed at Marv's feet. Ready to prove his prowess, our ever-able hero started making girlish squeals about his talent, picking up the frisbee and using a forehand throw to return it to its rightful owner. Or it would have been returned, had a pesky tree not grown directly into the flight path. Then, Marv told the stunned onlookers, "I'm actually very good." He was shot.

I'd rather dance with you than talk with them!

How do you spell RESPECT?

R-E-people call you to settle an argument regarding Sabretooth being Wolverine's father and then get you to come over and trade you beers for Marvel comics trivia-S-P-E-C-T.

Demon Cupcake!

I have a strange dog.

Face Dancin'

I finished Dune Messiah earlier today. It took so long because I interrupted it to read The Story of B by Daniel Quinn, and Age and Guile by P.J. O'Rourke. And, y'know, about 8 comics a day.

But my point is, I hate telephones. So it is really great that I have two lines. Everything you like about people in person is a reason to hate them on the phone. And being such a strong proponent of humanity, I blame the phone. Like how drawing a picture of someone steals their soul.

My hatred of phones is so honed that I think I could tell if a Tleilaxu was impersonating you. Yeah, I said it. Next up, Children of Dune.

This is me then.

Star Wars: Battlefront

There's been a lot of Battlefront going on over here, and every time the game says "reinforcements," I have to say it...

"Did somebody say my name? Justice Rocket Backpack Rocket Rocket Fire!"

Midnight Madness

We totally watched some Marx Brothers.

Then...we ran around.

Pop Culture Weekly

• She-Hulk 8: "Oh, you mean this? I've been working out."
• Smallville 4x04: Your introduction to PIKHAL and TIKHAL starts here.
• Ex Machina 5: This issue reminded me of an Onion headline. "Police Suspect Al-Qaeda or Teens."

McB Vs. Elevator

New Library

Christopher Reeve is dead.

I couldn't sleep tonight, so I just checked my computer to see if any sites had put up their Monday updates. And this story just broke in the last hour, although you probably won't/didn't hear it here first. So now I'm definitely not going to be able to sleep. It is sad news.

Van Damme Pose

Gender Equality

Fishing!

An EMP went off in my living room.

Smallville 4x03 Review

Woah, woah, woah. You're telling me that not only will you make me instantly attractive, you'll boost my seratonin levels dramatically? Yeah, I'll buy that for a dollar.

The Three P's: Possums, Porkchops and Piledrivers

Party til you sweat.

The Best Ones Always Start That Way

I feel sorry for everyone who needs to see the firsty sixty-some episodes of Smallville to be current with this week's effort. Sure, you'll see the Club Zero episode, instances of red kryptonite, the Lana and Chloe shower fight, and appearances by Christopher Reeve, but you won't be finding THE BEST EPISODE OF SMALLVILLE until 4x02.

The best way to describe it is to let you know that while Lois may be a bitch, Lana is a cunt. It's not very nice, but it's true.

UPDATE: In 2008, it is still true.

Debate Time!

Young Heroes in Love

I'm tired of taking great pictures of this couple. No one ever documented my young love this well. Oh wait...Yeah, I just checked my high school senior yearbook, and someone did.

Good friends. No, GREAT friends. No, SUPERfriends.